The Consumer Church Creed

The new creed for the consumer driven church: we believe in any kind of Jesus you fancy in fact we have several models to choose form. They include but are not limited to: the Jesus of Myth, the Jesus that never existed at all, the Jesus as a good ole boy rabbi, the Jesus who is just like every other holy dude, the Jesus that is untainted by miracle stories and anything that make you uncomfortable, and the Jesus who is a red bloodied all American straight white male heterosexual who will beat the hell out of anyone who says differently and lastly a sexless genderless changeling Jesus endorsed by several leading but ever downsizing Protestant bodies.


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